Love’s Own Truths

Families have an unconscious mind and soul that travel across generations and entangle those who follow in the fates of those who came before us. All members of a family are deeply bonded to each other in love and loyalty. This bonding love may cause us to invite disease, suffering, depression, relationship struggles, and even suicide, into our lives in an unconscious attempt to restore balance to our family systems. The dynamics of this larger family system lie beyond our awareness, yet their effect on our lives is profound.

We are deeply bonded to family members we may not have even known — for example, a parent’s early deceased sibling, or our grandparents’ previous partners, or an earlier family member’s stillborn, aborted, or miscarried child. “Orders of Love” is the term first used by Bert Hellinger, German psychotherapist and former priest to name these powerful forces that guide and influence our lives. The guiding forces in our lives include:

  • Parents give & children take
  • Everyone belongs in the family
  • Relationships require a balance of give & take

Many families operate in ways that violate these natural laws because of deeply unconscious patterns, loyalty to family secrets, and tragic losses that make grieving difficult. There are universal truths that connect all of us to one another, even while each family also has its own story that makes it unique. By restoring balance in our ancestral blueprints, personal suffering and unhappiness can be transformed into a force for healing. 

Who Might Benefit

  • Persons struggling with serious life issues, including health problems, depression or anxiety, chronic “survival mode,” painful relationship patterns, or career struggles
  • Couples wanting to create healthy and satisfying relationships
  • Those seeking to deal positively with severe illness and death of family members
  • Professionals — physicians, therapists, body workers, religious leaders and spiritual based healers — wanting to enrich their practices with new insights about health and human behavior
  • All those wanting more love, freedom, and clarity in their lives and relationships

The Workshop Experience

A sacred space is created where deeper, often unspoken truths about our families are acknowledged and honored. Participants describe the issue or problem they want to solve along with some factual information about their family. They choose workshop participants to represent family members, living or dead, and physically place them in relationship to each other according to their heartfelt image of their family system. In this constellation, an energy field is created where those involved experience physical sensations, emotions, and thoughts related to the family member they are representing.

The workshop leader facilitates an unfolding process where painful losses, family secrets, and harmful connections are revealed and honored. The constellation can then be restructured into a more balanced system where love and energy flow freely. Participants leave with a more nourishing family picture that inspires freedom, clarity, and love.